As the World Turns

How is it already October?! I have heard people say it for years, "The older you become, the quicker time seems to go by."  That statement couldn't feel more real than it does now.

Mark and I will celebrate our 3rd wedding anniversary next week. It feels like just yesterday that we stood at the outdoor alter at Christ Church with our closest family and friends. I know that 3 years isn't a terribly long time, but still. We have experienced so much together in that time. Mountain and beach vacations, trips to Boston at Christmas time, building our home, saying goodbye to an incredible dog, welcoming Luke into our family, adopting Lucy, and evacuating for our first major hurricane are some notable events. I've had a lot of people tell me that the two most challenging things for a couple to go through are building a house and having a baby and that if we could survive those events then we will be good. We survived the house building process and so far we are still standing as new parents.

But honestly, the only reason we have made it this far is because of God's great grace. We are far from perfect but we try our best to communicate with one another no matter how big or small an issue may be. The Lord has been so so good to us and we will continue to seek Him as we continue on this amazing journey together.

Another event that I believe speeds up time is having a baby. Luke will be 7 months old next week! SEVEN! I have no idea where the last 7 months have gone. With every new season we find ourselves in with Luke, that season becomes my new favorite. In just the last few weeks Luke has become proficient in rolling over in both directions, enjoys sleeping on his belly, has become strong enough to sit up with his hands supporting him on the floor, has eaten and enjoyed oatmeal, sweet potato, and banana, has tried avocado and egg but didn't care for it too much yet, drank water from a straw, had his first haircut, was dedicated at church, and is making more clear sounds when he talks (his favorite is dada.) Luke continues to brighten our days with his contagious smile and brings so much joy to our loves with his budding personality. I cannot imagine this world without him in it.

Lucy continues to settle in nicely in the 6 months she has been with us and we love her so. We are still getting used to having puppy energy in the house but she is a good girl. Luke is becoming more interested in her everyday. He likes to reach his hand out if she is close by to try and touch her and she loves to lick him every chance she gets. It won't be long before he is throwing the ball to her in the yard and they are running around together. All she wants is to be around her humans and love on us.




On the other side of that, it has been a little over 8 months since we lost our sweet girl, Lilo. It still feels so fresh some days. It doesn't take much for me to have a memory of her that snowballs into everything leading up to her passing. I hold back tears often. She sure was something special and impossible to forget. I'm thankful that we were able to honor her life by saving another.

I'm 36 years old and being a mom has been my absolute favorite job yet. I continue to struggle some with the whole working mom thing. I've been back for about 5 months now and it is difficult to drop him off at daycare each morning, although the tears have faded. I have no major issues with the actual daycare itself. His teachers are great and he is always happy when I arrive to pick him up at the end of the day. I just miss him so much and often feel like I am missing out on big things with him. He is changing so quickly and I want to be the one feeding him, changing him, playing with him, and putting him down for naps. I didn't realize until I actually became a mom, how difficult it would be to be both a mom and go to work full-time. Selfishly, I would love to spend my days with Luke but me working truly is what is best for our family at this point in time. I keep reminding myself of that and try to see the bigger picture. I admit that there have been days where I have allowed comparison to steal my joy and it is a real battle. Sometimes those days allow me greater opportunity to dig down deep and grow stronger in my faith. I pray for peace daily and am trusting God that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I've said it before but I am thankful that I work for a wonderful, family friendly, organization and with great people. That support is what helps to get me through the rough days.

Just this week, this quote was part of my daily devotional that stood out to me:

"Occasionally weep deeply over the life you hoped would be. Grieve the losses. Then wash your face. Trust God. And embrace the life you have." - John Piper

I love my life and know that I am greatly blessed with an amazing family. I am working on and learning to embrace every moment of this beautiful life I have been given. After all, time goes by way too quickly and seasons of life are just that, periods of time that eventually transform and make way for something else. We only get one life and I want to live mine filled with JOY. (Although those crazy hormones still try to get in the way.) 😉