No Time to be Sad

As I sat there, on the eve of my firstborn's first birthday, I was filled
of gratitude.  This past year has been a whirlwind and when I think of all that we have been through - the good, the bad, the ugly - I realize there is far more good than anything else. When I think of this past year, all of our happy moments come to mind first. Sure there were plenty of moments, hours, and days of frustration, tears, exhaustion...you get the idea. But no matter how difficult those times were, no matter how long the sleepless nights seemed to last, they are not what define the last 365 days. They are mere blips on the reel. The highlights are what stand out the most - the smiles, the laughter, the family time, a year full of firsts. A year that I say went by way to quickly even though it had the same 525, 600 minutes as every other non-leap year. It was certainly a year well spent.

I rocked my baby a little longer at bedtime tonight knowing that he would wake up a 1 year old. Many have asked me if I am sad that he is 1 already. Truthfully, I am not. I am thankful that we have made it to this day. I have enjoyed every stage of motherhood so far but I don't really find myself mourning the passing of each one.  I feel a lot of emotions as Luke turns 1 - happy, relieved that we all survived our first year, proud of the awesome person he is becoming, thankful for God's unending grace that I receive daily, hopeful for the future - but sad is definitely not one of them. I'm thankful for a happy, healthy, growing, and thriving boy who is reaching his milestones at his own pace. Every stage and every season will bring its own joys and memories and I don't want to miss any of them. Especially fun ones like his very first taste of cake, his first kids meal at a restaurant (which he devoured), or the look on his face when he figured out he could walk.

If there is anything that this past year has taught me, it is to enjoy the little things.  I try my best to embrace each day as the mom of this sweet little boy. He is changing every single day and it is the most amazing thing to be able to witness. His brain is processing things at high speed trying to figure out how everything around him works. He is a big chatterbox, trying so hard to communicate with us and it is fun realizing that he understands some of what we are saying to him now too. He is also very much on the move and exploring everything. I did, however, recently reminisce on the "good ol' days" when I could put Luke down on the floor and he wouldn't go anywhere haha. I'm not sad to see him grow a year older because, well, that is what he is supposed to do and it means we are figuring out this whole parenting thing. It is fun and exciting to watch him grow into the person God has created him to be. There are big plans for this little boy.

It is a privilege and a blessing to be Luke's mom and I thank God every single day that he chose me for this job. I pray that Mark and I will do all that we can every single day to make sure he knows that he is loved and cherished and that God's love for him is even greater than that somehow.

I know that one day I will miss him being little, but for today, I won't be sad. I will enjoy the snuggles and be ready to celebrate a pretty awesome 1 year old.

We love you, Lukeman! Happy 1st Birthday!